nothorses:

I know this is gonna be shocking to some folks, but transmascs are the ones you should be listening to about transmasc experiences.

So many people fully just come up with shit and decide they’re Real Transmasc Experiences, and the invisibility of actual transmascs means that these things tend to go fully unchallenged.

TERFs say they love us, and people believe them, so “transmascs aren’t targeted by TERFs and don’t have to worry about them”. When we speak up to say that’s a lie, that we are targeted, that we as individuals have been harmed by TERFs or know someone else who was, we’re brushed off or silenced. 

Radfems say we experience male privilege & are treated as cis men by society, and people believe them, so “transmascs are exactly like cis men, trans men are oppressors”. When we speak up and say that’s not true, that we personally have experienced, at most, negligible, momentary “privilege” reliant upon being stealth and keeping a massive part of our identities a secret- that transphobia as a system prevents anyone from seeing us as Real Men on a systemic level, even if we want to be- we’re disregarded as “misogynists”.

Cis people say we can’t experience misogyny, because only women do, & it’s “respectful” to our identities to deny our lived experiences. And people believe them, so “transmascs shouldn’t take up space in women’s issues”. When we speak up and say that erases our experiences with oppression, that we still need to be included in conversations about misogyny, reproductive rights, and patriarchy as men and as transmascs, we’re scolded for “misgendering ourselves”.

This theory and these definitions were not created with transmascs in mind. Invisibility has always played a huge role in our community’s struggle, and by shutting us down when we try to broaden the discussion, make space for ourselves, and speak to our own experiences, you are only enabling further violence against us.

Listen to us when we speak to our lived experiences. Don’t let TERFs, radfems, cis people, or even other trans people define what a transmasculine experience is. Don’t even let one of us speak for all of us; put in some work here. Include more perspectives, contradicting voices, and think critically about what seems truthful rather than convenient.